If I lived in a different time
would I behold the same mind?
would I long for revenge instead of love
would I bleed my gluttoned desires
or retire with hope,
for a better life?
If you changed my box
and punished me for my successes
would I, too, blunder
and fall to pieces?
Could I trust the lever
as I pulled it a million times before?
And when I said I loved you,
I was not conditioned to feel so
for free will endures in neurogenesis
or am I just Shakespeare’s fool
all over again?
I listen to distorted cognitive laughs
that cacophony of Freud’s shadows
tracks my wildest fantasies.
And the bell upon the watchtower
screams its unruly heart
as we muster our ways
from the classroom to boardroom
from the library to the grave
we see only the reflection
crying in dark alleyways.
In the silken road of dream’s gold
symbolic messages spare me once more
as I tumble like Alice to tomorrow
seeing your lips on his,
my learned behavior
of sorrow and loss.
And I wonder,
where it all went wrong
when I shall leave this cage
I’ve wrought in pain
who pushed the first domino?
© Bradley J Nordell 2020
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